Sick (JE #82)

There was a period when I was really sick. It was about 8 years ago.  I remember that hospital was a place that I have to visit every week. I didn’t like hospitals, but I disliked the school even more. Maybe that was the reason why I was so sick, for not being happy and cheerful. “Mom, I feel dizzy.” “Mom, I have an headache.” “Mom, I feel…” She had nearly gone mad. It was abstruse for her to understand why a kid can be so ailing for such a long time and never recovered.

I had been living in Taoyuan for 10 years. Whether at school or at home, I was not feeling well. I felt like there was something deep inside of me was struggling and disturbing my life. Everything I saw or heard gave me a strange and unfamiliar feeling. The only thing I wanted to do was to return to where I belong. Back at the time, my mom occasionally drove me to big hospitals in Taoyuan and Taipei. It was sad to see my mom dropping her job to take care of me. I feel sorry but helpless to deal with the situation. I was just hoping that I could be cured and go back to my normal life.